Three Sixty-Seven and Thirty-Six

High and Low…all in one day.

I only wish it would all go away.

It feels like years, but not even two.

Tell me please, what’s a D-mom to do?

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New Pump Slump

I’ve been struggling to write a post about the new life we are living with the pump.  Ian got his OmniPod on March 10th, and the last two weeks have been….

Exhausting. Frustrating. Liberating. Challenging. Scary. Exciting. Annoying.  Freeing. Confusing.

Put all those emotions together…and I find myself in a New Pump Slump.

I find I don’t really want to talk about his pump with people, because it’s isn’t a magic cure.

People seem dumbfounded that he isn’t “regulated.”

People seem to think that he’s fixed now with this pump.

He’s not.

And while it is a handy-dandy, pretty amazing little piece of technology, and will eventually be so much better….I feel like we are starting over in many ways.

It’s not as scary as it was a year ago when we had so much to learn….

But it’s a change that requires  you to let go of the “control” you thought you had – giving up control and trusting this little plastic pod on his body to do the right things. Yes, we still have the power to adjust the bolus, set the basal…(don’t even get me started on the new vocabulary I’ve picked up in 13 days).

It’s hard.

What we knew worked for baseball and gym days and snacks and meals and bedtime….doesn’t work anymore.

When he goes from 170 to 44 during baseball…

When he doesn’t even feel his low of 38…

It feels like we are failing him….like we’ve forgotten everything we’ve learned.

I know that none of this is true. I know we are doing the best we can and this is just another huge lifestyle change that will get better with time.

But when you are sleeping no more than 3 hours at a time each night….it’s hard to see things that way.

Our First Sick Day(s)…

The flu has hit two households since Sunday and it’s killing me slowly. It started with Ian’s half-brother, then stepmom, then dad.

The kids came here Tuesday night when things got really bad over there because at that point the three of us were still healthy.

That was at 10 pm.

By 3 am…Ian was sick.

By 6:30 am…we were in the local ER (which was definitely not the same as our Children’s hospital experience)

10:00 am…home from ER after an IV of fluids and Zofran.

The midday was a blur. MJ left for the Train concert at 3:30 with my stepmom. (At this point she showed no signs of sickness).

This is when is started quietly falling apart.

The weekend Ian was diagnosed we were planning on taking all four kids to a Cavs game. (He and I missed it).

On his birthday, he had a fever and missed school and his baseball game which crushed him. I mean, everything is special on your birthday.

And now to miss his first real concert.

It hardly seems fair.

~~~~~

It’s now Friday, everyone is now on the mend. MJ and I both had it mild and now it’s just a matter of getting Ian to eat regular food again. He’s weak and tired and apprehensive about putting anything in his body.

I’m exhausted but was able to sleep 11 hours last night (with random checks at 1:00, 4:00, and 8:00.)  That probably sounds like more than enough sleep but it still doesn’t make up for 4 hours of sleep  in the previous 48 hours.

This was a tough tough week but I learned a lot about how sick days work.  I’ve read about sick days many times but until you live it, it doesn’t mean a whole lot.  I was lucky to have my sister on-call and get some advice from her and am grateful for the docs at his Children’s hospital who are super sweet at 4 in the morning. I also had some new friends from the DOC who gave me some moral support. Thanks ladies!!

We will definitely be laying low the next few days as the temps are pushing 100, but we’ve got air conditioning and even more importantly, we got through this in one piece. I wish I could say the same for Ian’s favorite bear, “Rattley.” He was already pretty ragged but after two wash cycles in 48 hours he’s looking kinda like how I feel!